2011 timeline

As I end my year in a blog post, I want to share and take a look back on the highlights of my year 2011 J

January

-on my graduating year, still have some errands to do as an officer of the class. One of these is the preparation for our integrated seminar

-was elected as the chief editor of the yearbook

February

-23^rd-Integrated Seminar day

-last week-Graduation pictorial (malakas topak ko this day.)

March

-started arranging the elements on our yearbook

-started arranging my case forms to be submitted at PRC

April

-6^th- Baccalaureate Mass and Clinical Graduation in the morning at Antipolo Cathedral, Graduation ball in the night at Las Brisas

-8^th- Commencement Exercises at SMX

-holy week; spent head over heels while on self review in preparation for the mockboards (that’s what you called “penetensya”)

May

-2^nd and 3^rd-first Mockboard examination

-first review session at Manila. Na-homesick ako for three days, kahit hindi ako nag-apartment for that

-Mitchelle brought me to National Shrine of St. Jude Thaddeus for the first time

-filled my application for the board exam. Then to Trinoma mall after, for the first time

June

-first visit to Cover and pages for the yearbook

-to St. Claire for the first time, with Mitchelle again. Haha

-second Mockboard examinations at National University

July

-2^nd and 3^rd-NLE at La Consolacion College

-2^nd week-started on CSR job hunting. Unfortunately failed on first initial interview

-told someone I moved on :P

August

-still at (unfortunate) job hunting. Getting so frustrated ‘coz my friends got their job.

-three-day Medical mission with health team from Korea, plus Philippine Red cross volunteers. Hello to ‘Babycakes’ J

-21^st-became the happiest point and the happiest day indeed. Results of NLE was released, and I passed J)

-got my special prize, ate lunch with my family at Pancake house (yes, ganun ako kababaw :D)

-Cy being the RN celebration

September

-spell nganga month. Trying to get a real nursing job. Here I am in my frustrations. Trying to get my luck at Kapitolyo and unfortunately again, it failed me, but my friends didn’t.

-16^th-application for license done, then to PNA (naranasan ko nanaman ang feeling-inside-the-sardines-can as pagsakay ng LRT 1)

-pursued Mitch to take the board exam again

October

-14^th-started my work as a volunteer nurse in our health center. Happy to make my new family, new environment, a stepping stone to my career and a door to new experiences

-meet and greet the municipal mayor

-review sessions with Mitch

November

-Now I know what DTR stands for, because I signed one for the first time

-16^th-got my first compensation. Wooot!

-17^th-spent my birthday at center

-18^th-claimed my licensed at PRC, then bonding with my girlfriends

-19^th to 21^st-IVT training an UMC. Frustrating ang hindi maka-shoot sa ugat ni Kevin

-22^nd-IVT completion. Badtrip din ang bigyan ka lang ng cases. Err!

-that night, nabago ang mood ng dahil sa nakapag-insert ng IV to a patient. Yey!

December

-been friends with…sa facebook.

-on hot seat, oo na lang. haha.

-another bonding with the girls. Dahil todo kwento ako ng dahil sa lalake. Weh!

-Meteor shower viewing at center’s rooftop, of course, with my HC mates. First time again.

-first time at Misa de Gallo. Yes! Effort to wake up so early.

-18^th and 19^th-December board exam. Feel ko ang tension kesa sa mga nagbo-board kong friends.

-19^th-Ana’s Party fuel night

-20^th- Christmas party with my health center family

-21^st-series of deliveries, plus MEO’s Christmas party. Toxic?

-22^nd-Year-end conference (municipal Christmas party at Angono)

-25^th-spent Christmas at center, making the big corkboard with Andeng

-today-super overtime at work; ambulance crew plus series of deliveries is equals to super exhausting day to end the year.

Halos lahat yata first time, and halos latest events na lang ang naalala ko. Haha.

Whoever I had been with these events and every day of this year, whatever that happened, and wherever I had been, all I can say is I am so grateful. So thank you, and hope to have you again with me to another fulfilling yearJ

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

A SPECIAL CHRISTMAS WISH

I am much aware on a saying that wishes should not be revealed orally, or else, it may not come true. But for me, it is as precious as a pearl that I have to tell the whole World Wide Web, or else I may explode. I always longed to wish for myself. But this time, I am giving up this magic pixie dust of mine for someone else.

For at least three months time, I had given a part of my effort for a special friend, who longed to have her career to exceed to another level. As of this year, I have done my part to get myself the same thing that she wanted. She failed at first, but after convincing her, she has decided to try again, of course, with our offered help.

Few more days to go and another judgment day for her would come. Now, here’s the wishy-washy part: I really wanted her to pass the same challenge that we/she had six months ago (will it be still called the “same” challenge?). ah, basta! It would be just two whole day of full knowledge and confidence for her (and them!), just enough to say that after almost two months, we would see her/their full name in the .pdf list of passers posted over the internet. Just enough to say that all that I shared had helped a lot for her to be successful. Just enough to say that all our efforts won’t come to waste. Just enough to say that even though without getting to the top of the list, SHE STILL PASSED THE BOARD EXAM!

I believe that God is there to help us, just like how He had helped me the time I am wishing for this. Christmas is a time of giving. I may not have that time that I really liked to share the blessings I had. Maybe, He is telling me that this will be the right time. I hope that this will be the best way that I am sharing what I had, even though not with my full effort. Just what I have told in latter, “just enough”

-to Mitch, Andrea, Celyn, and Kath. Good luck my future RN friends! Even though not topping, passing is enough to be grateful. J

Twenty-one fruitful years is not that easy to live on. I've gone through ups and downs, I became happy and sad at one point of life, I had built memories with different people around me. I cried a lot, I laughed hard, I became irritated and angry, obsessed, insecure, pitied someone, even myself. But being contented in life is all that counts.

I still have so many dreams in store for me. I also (still) wishing for so many things that I want to have. I am really simply happy and grateful having good and healthy family and friends, running a pretty good career (which is just my birthday wish a year ago), and currently living a good and normal life. But my life does not only end with these things. I still have a lot of thoughts unresolved, things that I still can't afford, things I've longed to achieve.

Ang wishes ko ay parang goals din: may pang-long term, at meron din pang-short term. haha. I am still young, but as I aged, I feel that I'm holding much heavier responsibilities, more paths to walk on, and too many problems to solved to.

I thank God for being always an only-one-prayer-away to me. I also thank Him for all those wonderful blessings I had and I will have. I just wish that He'll be always there to continue hearing me and guide me for whatever I will be doing, and wherever I would be going.

gusto ko ng ganitong cake! :D

HAPPY TWENTY-FIRST BIRTHDAY TO MEEEE!!! :)

*bow* 

the one which saved me from my boredom :)

wala na kong time mag-update ng blog. haaay. pero, maganda naman ang dahilan kung bakit ganito.

yeah, just last last week, i decided to enter a volunteer work at our health center. yes, you saw it right again. :) even though the hard work won't give me anything in return, I feel so glad to be a part of it, and also the willingness to learn and gain those experiences. So far, it was all smooth, and I know that there would be more than what I want. haha.

hindi ganun kabigat yung work most of the days. Mga tipong first-aider lang ang eksena, taga-BP, assist in nebulization, etc. pero pag medyo gusto lang i-challenge ng tadhana, isa kang ambulance girl, post-partal monitoring, or much better, assist in labor and delivery.

first pose at hc (but not my first day in hc ha?) with andeng. preparing for delivery :)

hello to earth baby. clean, then oil bath muna :)

at least hindi na ko magrereklamo sa araw-araw na nganga na lang ako. yung oras na dati ganyan ang reklamo ko sa sarili ko, ngayon oras na ng shift ko. ramdam ko na din ulet ang pagod at antok (lalu na pag nasa night shift ako). darating din ulit ang araw na mai-stress na ulet ako. expected na yun:)

for now, i am loving this job, the new environment, the new people around me, the new experiences, almost all bago. ayoko muna mag-isip ng another plans, bahala na kung ano yung darating pa, or whatever. but what i need is to refresh my memory sa lahat ng natutunan ko, dahil kelangan kong na talaga gamitin.

kaya, naka-tengga ang maganda kong blog for new posts. nakupu, padami na ng padami ang utang ko sa lahat ng gusto kong i-blog post. tsk2x. but anyway, wish me luck from this career i am having today. ;) so glad to share it all to you!

Look after you-The Fray

babycakes:)

i super love my friends! these are the people who i treasured the most (besides my family, of course:)). although, some of them just leave me for some time, most of them always stayed by my side. i shared most of those good and bad times with them, the loudest laughter, the saddest tear, death-defying moments (yeah?), those long talks, and undying bonding moments. i can say that i have all of the greatest friends in life.

this blog post is all about my friends, who, although hindi pa kami ganun katagal na na-e-established (spell?), eh, let's say that they have brought something special in my life:)

ladies and gents, i present to you...(drumrolls...) "babycakes"!! :D

oh why "babycakes"?
close na talaga kami nitong mga ito since before naging "babycakes" ang tawagan namin. it all started when we do a volunteer work for a medical mission, helping the poor people and giving services together with korean medical team. we were referring the so-called "baby" to a cute guy interpreter whose in this picture:

yeah, because he is such a cute guy, i have to hide his face because i didn't have any permission to post his picture. (sorry:D) let's just say that this guy is the secret ingredient of our sweet friendship:)

then, facebook and twitter count it all up. mula sa palitan ng DP, tags, name it all! kahit sa simpleng internet connection nabubuhay ang sumisibol na friendship namin :)

i would like you to share just a little description of these girls, in my own viewpoint. haha!

cath
--super successful na yata nitong babaeng ito. mula sa career, pati na din lovelife. haha. tahimik lang yan sa personal, sa fb kasi yan maingay. LOLs :D sa buong experience namin sa Yoido, pinaka-unforgettable at pinaka-unkabogable na momentum ni cath ay ang mga katagang: "can we go now?" HUUUUUHAAAAAAA! :D

dheng
--ang babaeng pader! yes, you heard that right. madami mang kaisyuhan sa buhay ito na hindi natin nalalaman, pero hindi mo siya matitibag. kelangan lang nyan ng bola (as in ball) at kausap, okey na yan. :) siya nga pala ang discoverer ni boy silhouette (over there).


celyn
--si bhe ang waang sawang online sa fb. as in EVERYDAY! :D pagtutok lang ng armalite ng lola niya ang tila  pahinga niya sa pagtutok ng walang sawa sa computer. haha! super jolly ng babaeng ito, as in! siya ang tunay na karibal ni dheng kay boy silhouette. haha! sa kanila rin nauso ang pag-DP ng iba't ibang version with boy silhouette. :D



mitch
--ang babaeng wais...wais humawak ng money. haha! ang babaeng ito ay umaasenso sa talent nya sa kadaldalan. (oo naman, talent din yun.:D). siya ang pasimuno kung bakit kami napasama sa medical mission na ito. :) at, sa kanya nauso ang severely unkabogable "you know, people around me..." HUUUUWAAAAH! :D

syempre, ako si mai...



and even though we were only connected thru fb and twitter, parang super dami na naming pinagsamahan. nabubuhay kami sa consistently communication, encouragements if one of us feels down; we build happy memories thru little tweet talks and asaran as well. we still didn't have that exclusive bonding (you know, movies, simple dinner date, window shop, and such) (and i am looking forward to it! c:) but the world wide web seems to be a good place to hang-out with these girls. ♥


bbycakes, di ganun ka-furnished yung gawa kung blog. hehe. nitatamad kc ako nyan sa lagay eh :)

love you babycakes! ♥

muah tsup tsup! :D

hi peepz!

i'm so damn lazy to update my blog. hayy, i am not that busy but there are some blog posts that are lined up and i was not able to start them pa! err.

well, i owe you these blog posts:
1. a blog about my super inspiration in making my blog better: Bianca Gonzalez. i still have to read all of her posts (imagine, from 2003? yikes) (and wala pa ko sa half way) so that i will be able to start my line-up of my favorite bianca's blog posts.
2. blog about my babycakes---ooh, this one's on my draft. and because i was too lazy, i can't think of anything more to include. so my babycakes, antayin nyong sipagin ako. haha!

so much for this damn laziness! nakakabobo. err!

here's how you'll join my site.

Joining sites that use Google Friend Connect

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Here's how to join a Google Friend Connect site for the first time:

1. Click Join this site in the Sign-in gadget to pull up the sign-in window. You may need to disable your pop-up blocker to view the window.
2. If you've never joined a Friend Connect site before, you'll be asked to sign in with an account. You can sign in with a Google Account, a Yahoo!, an AOL, or any OpenID account. Choose the type of account you'd like to use by clicking the link, and then sign in to your account.
3. Fill in the name you'd like to use on that site, add a picture if you like, and clickJoin this site. (You may also edit your settings before joining by clickingOptions > Site Settings. If you don't the default settings will be used. Learn more about Settings)

It's easy to join a new Google Friend Connect site if you've already joined one.

1. Click Sign In in the Sign-in or Members gadget.
2. Confirm your name and image, then click Join this site. (Note: if you're not using a Google Account to join your favorite Friend Connect sites, you'll need to provide your sign-in information for each site you join.)

(Source: http://www.google.com/support/friendconnect/bin/answer.py?answer=112070&topic=16611 )

never got any luckier.

hi peeps!

my blog post tonight is quite a bit upsetting :( i practically didn't have a good day, but i don't stress myself for that thing. oh well, here it goes...

i started the day early, though, i am (now) not fond of waking up too early. but because i'll have a long day ahead of me, i am in a state of bringing myself up, hoping it would be a lucky day for me.

my destination: Ynares Center. the "bunutan day" ika nga nila. together with my friends, we tried our luck to join this one-time quarterly opportunity to have a job as a nurse in a government hospital here in Rizal, which is a program of our governor. program started at 9am. names to be chosen was drawn randomly. out of 550 registered nurse applicants, 80 luckily got the slot. so, after hours of long waiting, and to make the long story short, i didn't get any of those eighty. but my friend Cath luckily got a slot. haha. partidang ako pa ang naghulog ng slip nya sa tambiolang maganda. "swerte kamay ko 'pag nabunot ka. haha." sabi ko sa kanya. fate marked my word, even though it was not for me.

hindi talaga ako swerte sa mga bunutan. everytime i joined that kind of contest, never in my life that my entry was picked up randomly. i still tried my best for the luck, at malapit ko nang i-disregard ang slitang iyan sa bokabularyo ko. at the end of the day, uwi akong disappointed.

but there would be no regrets of whatever i've done. i tried, but i never got luckier. i still made myself happy at the middle of the day, despite of stressing myself for disappointments and blaming it all to fate (okay, to be honest, i blamed it. >.<) i didn't get my hopes too high for that thing. after that, i just spend the day normally, as if everything's okay; bond with my friends, celebrated Cath's success, celebrated my sis' birthday, even cooked for her. i just told myself that (heto nanaman ang walang kamatayang....) "hindi minamadali ang lahat, kung hindi mo pa oras, hindi pa talaga. it will be all in God's time." after all, most of the people around me was happy today. maybe, whatever happiness they got, they really deserve it. either i became a part of their  happiness or i was one of who made them happy.

so, heto, back to basics. still an unemployed, RN (resting nurse. haha.). aantay ulit ng panibagong alok ng opportunity, or maybe another chance that in that time, luck will finally struck me. i admit that i was so tired of waiting, but whatever happens, it would all be in God's time.

...and then I wait again....

for the win!:) (a repost)

I joined Bianca Gonzalez's 8th blogger anniversary giveaway. nakita ko na yung post last week sa dashboard pero hindi ko pinansin. one hour left for the contest saka ko lang napansin ang post, sa twitter pa! kaya eto, super rush sa paggawa ng entry, kala mo, essay-writing contest nanaman. nakaka-engganyo naman kasi ng prizes. haha!

so here's my entry, posted as comment at http://www.iamsuperbianca.com/2011/09/super-blog-giveaway-on-my-blogs-eighth.html

Maria Mylene T. Hernando
20 y/o
graduated at Unciano Colleges Antipolo--practically a Registered Nurse but I am not yet on practice
Mahabang Parang, Angono, Rizal
@click017mai/click.017mai@yahoo.com
my favorite bianca's blogpost:
Title: touched by a stranger.
date posted: july 22 2011
--i have followed your blog for the past 2 months. yes, you saw that right. this was the very first post i've seen that made me discover and follow your blog.
this blog post seems to telling all your blog readers (and the whole wide world, of course) that there would be THAT person, either he/she was close to your heart, or maybe someone you've met for the first time that will inspire you, would made you feel glad, and most of all, would give you even just a bit of love. and in an unexpected way, that person is a someone you have just met a minute ago, a someone that is neither your friend, nor your family, but a someone who is willing to part you a bit of love.
i wanted to be like THAT STRANGER to anyone in my own special way of blogging. i wanted to inspire someone by my blogs, although all of those blog post didn't pay any tribute to a particular person.
i can also relate that blog post title to you. because in your own simple way, you are able to inspire and draw a smile on the faces of your readers (like me) whenever we read your posts. you may be a total stranger to others, we may also be a total stranger to you, but as you have said, "strangers can definitely touch and move you, in the exact time that you may need it. pay it forward and go out of your way to do something nice for a total stranger." :)

*(itatago ko muna ang mga gusto kong mapalanunan..baka kasi mausog..haha:D sowree :P)*

wew. quite rush for my entry. hehe. i just want you to enjoy it, even i didn't have the chance to win.

so goodluck na lang to me. swertihan eto pag weeeeeeeeeener!:)




----i reposted this blog post. it was Bianca Gonzalez (not Bianca Manalo) sorry..

from one to five within a week! :))

i've been keeping my blogger account since 2008 but my most concern/dilemma is my followers. i always want this blog as public as it is, but no one, even some stranger seems to care. fortunately, as i was broadcasting this page on facebook, pageviews are getting higher, AND...taran! two more followers! haha. i am sooo glad. madami nang pumapansin sa aamagin kong blog. :)

so thank you:) hoping for more higher pageviews and more followers. if you are still not a follower, click the "follow" button on the top banner of this screen. OR click the "Join this Site" button, just on the right side of this screen. add me as well on Google Friends Connect, or Facebook, follow my Twitter account, or I might add you personally:)



*broadcast:D*

putting a title after my full name :)

August 20, 2011<--marahil eto na nag pinakamasayang araw ko na halos hindi ko naman maramdamang masaya ako. (gulo?) dala-dala ko pa kasi nung mga panahong yun yung kaba. oo, weeks before wala na talaga sa konsensya ko na lalabas na ang result ng board exam. I'm too busy thinking of how will I get a job, how should I finish the yearbook and how would I spend those bummer days.


salamat sa mga friends ko. Eto kasing si Ana Gabriel, kung makapagtext kala mo wala lang. e seryoso pala sya..ang loka, di talaga naniwala..wala namang nagtetext na iba. ayun, thanks again to my other friend, Vanessa Ocampo, sya ang matyagang tumawag sa kin para iconfirm for me. still, i didn't tell the whole thing to the whole house, the whole subdivision and to the whole fb world. di ba super secret for the sweet success:) and to confirm the whole thing, my other friend, Kristel, gave me the pdf listing, chit chat for hours, spending the night on the sidewalk, keme sa mga lamok (haha).


then ayun, parang wala lang nung una nung sinabi ko, parang deadmabims lang. pero later that night, ayun we're so happy na. And I'm still living the dream.


But most of all, isa lang talaga ang pinasasalamatan ko ng bongga, si God iyun. kasi, alam kong sya nagpasa sa akin. wala na akong confidence na papasa pa ako. I just told him na Siya na lang talaga at nasa kamay niya  na ang lahat. dahil na-scan na, nasagutan na, na-shade na, wala nang balikan, magic na lang niya talaga. And you know what? He did not fail me! God is really good, and all my life, I know I'll pay him for all the gratitude He deserve from me.


As i will put another title in my (long) name, I also put another new chapter in my life, and it will be in my calling that I'll be taking care of those people who will need my service, for rich and for the poorer, in sickness or in health, newly-born-s or until deaths. this is given to me by God and I should do it for his will. (whatever grammar it will be:D)


practice nga ulit :D
-Maria Mylene T. Hernando, RN
*woot sarap! nalasahan ko? oo, di lang masarap, malinamnam pa :D*

the life of an unemployed me. bow!

a month after board, heto at dakilang tambay pa din ako sa aming butihing bahay. hindi rin ganon kasarap ang maging tambay. minsan, maiisip mo na mas masarap yung buhay estudyante. papasok sa school, matututo, yung iba allowance lang ang habol, then gala with friends after class, gagawa ng assignment, tutulog, and will do the same routine everyday but in a way that you'll look forward for each day differently. minsan stressed. but then, each day will help you improve yourself, not only on knowledge, skills and attitude, but as a whole person.

...and balik tayo sa buhay tambay. as i said, hindi ganon kasarap ang maging tambay. you'll wake up each morning with absolutely nothing to do. volunteer siguro sa gawaing bahay, but then iba pa din yung you'll be doing something for yourself, di ba. in short, super bummed ka talaga.

...and then, i decided to seek for something worthy: job. yeah, i wanted and i really planned to work after board. i started to seek help, then some of my friend offered me an opportunity for an interview. call center. naku! syempre, first timer, totally no idea. nakaka-engganyo naman kasi ang job position: health care associate. related sa course mo ang dating! dahil may bayad ang ingles, you need to speak in a language which you are not freely to express. ayun, sabak lang. in the end, bagsak pa din. pero ok lang, you learned something.

then, nag-try na kong magpasa ng resume sa internet at pharmacies. bad timing lang yung iba, invited ako pero hindi naman ako maka-gora for some reasons. but then, nung ako eh, ok ok na ulet, i tried grabbing an opportunity, not knowing na isa palang agency yun. haha. e di naloka nanaman ang lelang mo! kala mo, totoong interview na, e class interview pa lang pala yun. but i learned a lot. this agent (which i think is a super girl sa gandang nakaka-shiboli :D) told us those ways to score an interview even though isa kang taong nagpu-pursue ng career not related for a call center job. although, more of them are some lies, sa interview lang naman daw yun. then if that job is serving a stepping stone, you can still go and pursue your career. nakaka-motivate nga naman pumasok sa call center 'coz of her words.

four o'clock pm of that same day, sabak again kami for an interview. score! kahit sablay-sablay. baka nga tinamad lang yung recruiter kaya almost all of the class passed. then proceed kami agad-agad ng online interview. proud na kong naabot ko yung online exam, alam ko kasi na yung alanganing part is over. nadalia nga ko eh. hindi ko lang alam kung saang  part ng exam ako bumagsak! hanep eyaan! at the end of the day, i got a new pair of shoes pa. pa'no, nawasak na yung sandals ko na padating na sa point na hindi na ako makakauwe without getting myself a new one.

kahit dawang beses nang failed, pinanindigan ko pa din ang kasabihang "try and try until you succeed". i tried entering another call center, and again, i failed the initial interview. nakaka-frustrate di ba? yes, i became frustrated but only for a short time. aaminin kong hindi talaga ako magaling magsalita ng ingles, or even doing my grammar throgh writing. (e baka nga dito lang may wrong grammar na. haha) but i admit it. naniniwala naman akong madadala ko pa sa practice. yun lang, hindi ko alam kung hanggang saan pa ang aabutin ko para maramdaman ko yung totoong frustration. but then again, i stayed positive. at sabi ko, wala naman akong dapat ikalunkot. hindi ko naman kasi field yung mga binabagsakan ko, so ok lng. plus, napakaraming call center sa 'pinas. wag ko lang uulit-ulitin yung mga same mistakes na nagawa ko na. (haha makaya ko kaya?) sabi nga sa'kin ni carlo (my bestfriend's boyfriend) "sige pa, bukas ulet. dapat walang pahinga. *laughs* makakabisado mo na ang laman ng interview pag paulit-ulit ka." haha! tama sya. kabisado ko na nga ang tell me about yourself.


i know what is that thing i cannot manage: anxiety (kaba). pag ako kasi kinabahan, hangga't hindi natatapos ag isang bagay, andun lang sya. di naman ako nagkakape. hindi talaga kasi ako isang "relaxed" person. *sighs* but then, i am trying to correct it. brrrrr.

umabot di ako sa point na i am telling myself to stop. sabi ko nga sa sarili ko "this is not my field, i didn't choose to enter nursing for four years that in the end, i'll be just working as a call center agent. this would be the last." but looking through reality, as i travel from this place to another, it seems that i have no choice. parang wala nang trabaho for people like us. kung bakit ba naman lumobo ang nursing ng ganitong panahon, na kahit hospitals ayaw nang tumanggap ng volunteer. parang mga allergic sa 'min? kahit mismong call center, eh, tatagain ka ng tanong na mapapaisip ka talaga. yung mga tipong "bakit mo ba gustong magtrabaho dito kung isa kang nursing? why not pursuing your nursing career? and WHY DO YOU TAKE UP NURSING AT THE FIRST PLACE?" gosh, ang sakit nila magtanong. parang sinasabing wala kaming sarili or stable na decisions. err! (projection!)

but then again, going back to telling myself that i'll stop, sa kakakwento din ng ibang tao sa experience ng mga pagkabigo nila (special mention to my bhez and andeng, sama na natin si neah-nabasa ko lang sa tumblr nya) i just realize na walang masama to take another try-pag ok na ulit ako financially. hehe. sana nga, for the fourth time, makaabot na ko ng job offer. pero mukhang hindi ko na maaabot yung goal ko na magkatrabaho just before the board results came up. and for clarrification, hindi ako magka-career shift. totoo, stepping stone ko lang ito. gusto ko din ng konting luxury, so i am sorry if ever i'll be telling it on my interviews. hehe.

for now, back to tambay mode nanaman ako. haaaay. ngayon ko lang talaga namimiss ang stress, na dating ayaw na ayaw makita sa'kin ng mga kaibigan ko, lalu na ni mitchelle. haha. one more chance pa din ang antay ko, kaya sana, sa susunod na chance, eh, makuha ko na :)

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wala akong magawa..kaya eto, brooooooooowwwwsssssseee!

You, by the light

Is the greatest find

In a world full of wrong

You're the thing that's right

Finally made it through the lonely

To the other side

You set it again, my heart's in motion

Every word feels like a shooting star

I'm at the edge of my emotions

Watching the shadows burning in the dark

And I'm in love

And I'm terrified

For the first time and the last time

In my only life

And this could be good

It's already better than that

And nothing's worse

Than knowing you're holding back

I could be all that you need

If you let me try

You set it again, my heart's in motion

Every word feels like a shooting star

I'm at the edge of my emotions

Watching the shadows burning in the dark

And I'm in love

And I'm terrified

For the first time and the last time

In my only

I only said it 'cause I mean it

I only mean 'cause it's true

So don't you doubt what I've been dreaming

'Cause it fills me up and holds me close whenever I'm without you

You set it again, my heart's in motion

Every word feels like a shooting star

I'm at the edge of my emotions

Watching the shadows burning in the dark

And I'm in love

And I'm terrified

For the first time and the last time

In my only life

(From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/k/katharine-mcphee-lyrics/terrified-lyrics.html) 

**i am pretty sure that i'll fall in love head over heels with this song

exactly 3 days before i turn my life into another page. parang wala pa din. hindi pa din ako kinakabahan. in fact, i am scared for not being nervous at this point. i should be nervous but i'm not! ayokong dumating yung araw na dun lang ako kakabahan. gusto ko ngayon na.

at some point, i am not too confident, and a little bit worried about myself. i know i should be asking myself from now if will i make it? but only those blank stares and empty thoughts seems to be appearing.



JUNE 29,2011; 12:36 am
3 days, AYAN!  when i'm on my own dimension,without the books and the rest of those test papers, kinakabahan na ko. natatakot akong bumagsak. natatkot din ako for my friends na baka bumagsak din sila..

at ang panira ng moment ay kilig:

alam nyo ba na ang feeling ng pagiging in love ay hindi naman talaga nanggagaling sa ating puso, ito ay galing sa base ng ating utak nakung tawagin ay pituitary gland. naglalabas ito ng hormone na kung tawagin ay endorphins. ito naman ay pumupunta sa aying dugo at nagbibigay ng feeling na para bang kinikilig.

kean-wala na tayo

"Yan' ang kailangan, pero hindi mo pinayagan Alam kong wala na tayo Alam mong wala na tayo Alam kong wala na tayo Di ko na kailangan pang ipilit pa O wala na tayo Wala na tayo" 

Porque

I was riding on a jeepney to somewhere when I first heard this song. Then I became quite familiar with it when we are having our duty at Angono General Hospital just this previous semester. It takes a long time before I figured out what was the title of this song. Thanks to my friend Cy, she downloaded the song for me. It was like an impulse whenever and wherever the song will play that I have to shake someone and agitated-ly shout at him/her "Yan! Yan! Yan yung kanta!! waaaaaa anung title nyan!!!"

but, I mostly dedicate this song to my friend Jake, who is a Chavacano. :) kahit man lang 'to sana kaya nyang kantahin sa 'min. 'di kasi kumakanta yan eh :D

PORQUE by Maldita

Tulala lang sa’king kwarto
At nagmu-muni-muni
Ang tanong sa’king sarili
Sa’n ako nagkamali

Bakit sa’yo pa nagkagusto
Parang bula ika’y naglaho

Chorus:
Porque contigo yo ya iskuji
Aura mi corazon ta supri
Bien simple lang iyo ta pidi
Era cinti tu el cosa yo ya cinti
Ta pidi milagro, vira’l tiempo
El mali hace derecho
Na dimio reso ta pidi yo
Era olvidas yo contigo

Ang lahat ay binigay ko
Ngayon ay sising-sisi
Sobra sobra ang parusa
Di alam kung kaya pa

Wag nang lumapit
At tumawag pa at baka masampal lang kita
Di babalikan
Magsisi ka man
Ako ay lisanin

Porque contigo yo ya iskuji
Aura mi corazon ta supri
Bien simple lang iyo ta pidi
Era cinti tu el cosa yo ya cinti

Bakit ikaw pa ang napili
Ngayon ang puso ko ay sawi
Kay simple lang ng aking hiling
Na madama mo rin ang pait at pighati

Sana’y magmilagro
Mabalik ko
Mali ay maiderecho
Pinagdarasal ko sa’king puso
Na mabura na sa isip ko

...then I found out, bitter pala yung message ng kanta?mga bigo talaga sa pag-ibig (like me??nyahahahah!)

another valentines day..

let's take a look at valentines day this time...

The history of Valentine's Day — and its patron saint — is shrouded in mystery. But we do know that February has long been a month of romance. St. Valentine's Day, as we know it today, contains vestiges of both Christian and ancient Roman tradition. So, who was Saint Valentine and how did he become associated with this ancient rite? Today, the Catholic Church recognizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus, all of whom were martyred.

One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men — his crop of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine's actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.

Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons where they were often beaten and tortured.

According to one legend, Valentine actually sent the first "valentine" greeting himself. While in prison, it is believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl — who may have been his jailor's daughter — who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter, which he signed "From your Valentine," an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories certainly emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic, and, most importantly, romantic figure. It's no surprise that by the Middle Ages, Valentine was one of the most popular saints in England and France.

While some believe that Valentine's Day is celebrated in the middle of February to commemorate the anniversary of Valentine's death or burial — which probably occurred around 270 A.D — others claim that the Christian church may have decided to celebrate Valentine's feast day in the middle of February in an effort to "christianize" celebrations of the pagan Lupercalia festival. In ancient Rome, February was the official beginning of spring and was considered a time for purification. Houses were ritually cleansed by sweeping them out and then sprinkling salt and a type of wheat called spelt throughout their interiors. Lupercalia, which began at the ides of February, February 15, was a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, the Roman god of agriculture, as well as to the Roman founders Romulus and Remus.

To begin the festival, members of the Luperci, an order of Roman priests, would gather at the sacred cave where the infants Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome, were believed to have been cared for by a she-wolf or lupa. The priests would then sacrifice a goat, for fertility, and a dog, for purification.

The boys then sliced the goat's hide into strips, dipped them in the sacrificial blood and took to the streets, gently slapping both women and fields of crops with the goathide strips. Far from being fearful, Roman women welcomed being touched with the hides because it was believed the strips would make them more fertile in the coming year. Later in the day, according to legend, all the young women in the city would place their names in a big urn. The city's bachelors would then each choose a name out of the urn and become paired for the year with his chosen woman. These matches often ended in marriage. Pope Gelasius declared February 14 St. Valentine's Day around 498 A.D. The Roman "lottery" system for romantic pairing was deemed un-Christian and outlawed. Later, during the Middle Ages, it was commonly believed in France and England that February 14 was the beginning of birds' mating season, which added to the idea that the middle of February — Valentine's Day — should be a day for romance. The oldest known valentine still in existence today was a poem written by Charles, Duke of Orleans to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London following his capture at the Battle of Agincourt. The greeting, which was written in 1415, is part of the manuscript collection of the British Library in London, England. Several years later, it is believed that King Henry V hired a writer named John Lydgate to compose a valentine note to Catherine of Valois.

In Great Britain, Valentine's Day began to be popularly celebrated around the seventeenth century. By the middle of the eighteenth century, it was common for friends and lovers in all social classes to exchange small tokens of affection or handwritten notes. By the end of the century, printed cards began to replace written letters due to improvements in printing technology. Ready-made cards were an easy way for people to express their emotions in a time when direct expression of one's feelings was discouraged. Cheaper postage rates also contributed to an increase in the popularity of sending Valentine's Day greetings. Americans probably began exchanging hand-made valentines in the early 1700s. In the 1840s, Esther A. Howland began to sell the first mass-produced valentines in America.

According to the Greeting Card Association, an estimated one billion valentine cards are sent each year, making Valentine's Day the second largest card-sending holiday of the year. (An estimated 2.6 billion cards are sent for Christmas.)

Approximately 85 percent of all valentines are purchased by women. In addition to the United States, Valentine's Day is celebrated in Canada, Mexico, the United Kingdom, France, and Australia.

Valentine greetings were popular as far back as the Middle Ages (written Valentine's didn't begin to appear until after 1400), and the oldest known Valentine card is on display at the British Museum. The first commercial Valentine's Day greeting cards produced in the U.S. were created in the 1840s by Esther A. Howland. Howland, known as the Mother of the Valentine, made elaborate creations with real lace, ribbons and colorful pictures known as "scrap."


well that's the history of valentines..
this is mine's...

i never hate valentines with the mere fact that i am single for 20 years. all i had done (as long as i remembered) every year in this exact day is to make cards, pasok ng ordinary day, kesyong may gagawin kang card sa art class at nagkakaubusan na ng red cartolina. haha. nung college, nagpasahan ng written report sa sts (na nakapost pa pala dun sa isa kong blog sa fs) at anu pa ba?? hmmmm..

valentines day is so ordinary for me. but LOVE naman ang pinakamahalaga sa atin sa araw na yan. araw yan ng pagpapakita ng pagmamahal, makasaksi ng super power of love with the means of flowers, red cards, chocolates, teddy bears, cuddles, etc. eh ewan. wala pa yata akong naranasan dyan maliban sa card..at idagdag mo na nga yung choco mallows na pilit..hangggang ngayon nakokonsensya pa din ako don..haha.. pero keme lang..darating din ako sa point na iyan na someday, higit pa riyan ang matatanggap ko..di ko inaantay at di ko din hinahanap..pero alam ko nandyan lang..(ay sauce! <3)


so i'll just wish all of you an advance happy valentines, and a happy single awareness day to all the singles out there..and wish you all the luck to all those couples..(saan sila magde-date on a monday night..an sagwa ah..lunes na lunes..haha)


<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
repost this and someone will kiss you on valentines day.
choz!
-haha, isa pang gimik ito..echos lang..